Moonlight Conversations: New layer

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There is just something about the moon that just puts me in a trance. Its quite therapeutic. Like tonight, usually I catch the moon when I’m driving home. However, I’m driving west in the opposite direction and it seems as if the moon is directly in front of me. I know in essence it “moves” or rather the earth rotates and all that good stuff but there is something more comforting in believing that the moon simply follows and guides me. Especially in the wee hours of the night.

He’s just a half moon tonight yet still as gorgeous as the fullness I adore. Today has been a very great day full of blessings and new beginnings. I feel very much like the half moon tonight who hasn’t quite reached its full potential but I know that when it does it will shine so bright. I’ve peeled back another layer of myself and I can’t wait to eventually shine as bright as my full Mr. Moon. In the meantime, I’ll continue to admire and appreciate my half moon both literally and figuratively.

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Searching

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In constant search of the perfect him.
Settling momentarily until the parts that isn’t him
Cause you to yearn for the parts that will complete him.
So you settle temporarily once more.
All the while, basking in the parts that is him
Until the parts is isn’t him
Cause you to yearn for the parts that will complete him.
So you move on, to the other side of him
The side of him that exudes the other half of
Your unrealistic depiction of the perfect him.
Once again basking in the parts that is him
Until the parts that isn’t him
Cause you to yearn for the parts that will complete him.
This image, depiction, dream, ideal…
Blinds you when you find what could be him.
The him that possesses what the past him didn’t
And what the present him does.
But your blinded perception of the perfect him hinders you
Causing you to search once more…
Again, you turn the pages, onto the next chapter.
All the while, basking in the parts that is him
Until the parts that isn’t him
Cause you to yearn for the parts that will complete him, complete you.
If only you knew you are already whole without him.

Quotes for the Soul: Stillness

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I recently took a trip to Italy. My hope before I left was to allow the beauty of the country to whisper words to me. Words that would manifest into poetry that would live with me forever but this unfortunately didn’t eventuate. What I learned instead was how important it is to simply be still. Still enough to breath, to think, to exist. My days were filled with scheduled tours, accompanied lunches and dinners, visiting family and shopping. The pictures I took stilled the beauty of the places and moments for me but I never existed within these places and moments long enough to soak them in. On my last day I took a solo stroll through Rome in an attempt to be fully present and those few hours of solitude is what plays most in the highlight reel of my 6 day trip. This was the one moment my mind was still. I had no place to be,  no appointment or pace to keep, no other being to accommodate. In that moment I was truly able to savor the beauty of such a magnificent place and imprint it into the stillness of my being for a lifetime.

“In the midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you” -Deepak Chopra

More

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Closed my eyes and kept thinking of you.
I wanted to say this before I doze off.
I like the comfort you provide.
Being myself and expressing the thoughts
that reveal my ability to be selfish,
or painting myself in a not so good light,
or sharing my fears with you,
comes with ease, no effort, nothing forced.
Thus far, it’s what I find most attractive.
I like you more than I did a few weeks ago.

Texts

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I don’t know why I keep
reading your text messages.
Screen shooting the significant ones,
sweet ones, mean ones.
They only send me into a tailspin.
I smile and blush at some,
frown and cringe at others.
All the while searching for
some sort of validation that
the moments were real,
that the feelings I developed
were warranted and not birthed from
some figment of my imagination.

Quotes for the Soul: 9-11

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“Commending the victims to almighty God’s mercy, I implore his strength upon all involved in rescue efforts and in caring for the survivors.” — Pope John Paul II, Sept. 11.

It was the first semester of my senior year of high school and I was in English class. The principal made an announcement I didn’t listen to and then the TV in our classroom began broadcasting what was happening. I sat on top of my desk for some reason. I was really intrigued, terrified and confused and couldn’t turn away. I immediately thought of all my family in NY. My grandmother, aunts, uncles and cousins and wondered if they were OK. I wasn’t one of the cool kids with a cell phone so I couldn’t call my mom to ask or get any sort of update. I recall going home after school and watching the footage over and over and over. The sight of the 2nd plane hitting the towers still gives me chills to this day and every single time I hear a plane flying over head while at home I fear it may be another attack.

On this day, I pray for the families still mourning and for those still suffering the residuals of that day. I pray for the troops overseas who are fighting a seemingly never ending battle and as cheesy as this may sound I truly pray for peace. God Bless!

 

Moment

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I keep getting the feeling that I should be capturing this moment, this experience. I’ve never done anything so daring in the name of romance and possibly love. I’m nervous as heck. The butterflies in my stomach seem drunk. Fluttering about in all different directions. But among the chaos I still feel a sense of peace and calm. I trust him with my safety and dare I say heart? So here I am embarking on this new journey, adventure. I don’t know where this will lead but I want these words to frame this moment in time. Who knows, maybe I’ll be reading this to our kids one day.